Sounding better - #36

Dan Rutter cleans out his ears to let the sound flow freely.

People, in general, are a bunch of cloth-eared gits.

Seriously, they are. There's no other explanation for the overall awfulness of PC audio.
Oh, all right. <i>Maybe</i> there's another reason why so many people tolerate hideously lousy sound. Maybe they just don't tremendously <i>care</i> about sound quality; anything better than the PC speaker will do.

If you're just playing the occasional game, using office applications, maybe playing a bit of random music as mental wallpaper while you do other things, then sure, it'd be fabulous if you had Yahweh's Own Sound System, but those two little plastic boxes that someone paid far too much for at Dick Smith Electronics 15 years ago will do.

OK. I can see that.

If you're considering an upgrade for your PC audio transducers, though, there are ways to get better value for your speaker- or headphone-buying dollar. There are also ways to improve the sound of your existing setup for free.

First up, the same advice you'll get from those Get The Best Sound From Your Crappy Little Mini System pamphlets…

Satellite speakers should be aimed pretty much at your head. If your speakers have ports, those ports shouldn't be hard up against a surface (wall, desk panel, bookshelf). It also pays to experiment with the position and heading of your subwoofer, if you've got one.
And there's the old phase problem, too. If you've got one or more bare-wire connections in your speaker system and you've pushed one wire-pair into its spring terminals the wrong way around, everything'll sound quite severely peculiar. You can get a similar effect by not inserting a stereo 1/8 or 1/4 inch plug all the way.

Want big speaker sound for your computer, dirt cheap?

A lot of people have an old stereo of some sort mouldering away in the garage; if not, flea market enthusiasts can easily find one for $25 or so. An elderly wood-sided receiver hooked up to a pair of plaid-grilled speakers that looked cool in 1977 will solidly sonically defeat almost all three-piece 'multimedia' speaker systems, provided it works. And that's not so hard to ascertain, even in the middle of a garage sale or op shop. Steer clear of those disastrous Tandy systems with giant masonite speakers that contain one piddly little driver. Check the drivers in other speakers to make sure their rubber cone surrounds haven't perished, and nobody's kid has at some point stuck crayons in the tweeter.

Then, acquire a $5 1/8th inch to twin RCA lead, and you can connect any PC's sound hardware to the Aux input of the old system's amplifier (or separate pre-amplifier, if it's fancy). The speakers almost certainly won't be magnetically shielded, so don't put 'em next to your CRT monitor. And you're done.

What about headphones? Glad you asked.

A lot of people who listen to their PC through speakers would actually be a lot happier with a decent pair of headphones. Gamers who like positional audio are a case in point, here; it's difficult and expensive to set up a speaker system that can match a mid-range pair of headphones for 3D sound.

If you've got an MP3 player, it probably came with terrible headphones. Even if you need 'phones you can jog with, there are lots of better options that don't cost a fortune. Koss and Sennheiser both make decently priced small ear-clip and headband 'phones that beat every bundled 'earbud' tiny-'phone by a mile.

Personally, I like Sennheiser's big over-ear headphones, as much for their comfort as for their sound. There are plenty of other candidates, though, which are best experienced in a proper hi-fi store that'll let you try them on and listen to music you brought with you.
One option that many hi-fi stores don't offer are 'in-ear monitors'. They're not like the standard little earbuds that you wedge over your ear hole; instead, they plug in like, well, earplugs. This gives them superb acoustic coupling to your eardrum, allowing amazing bass response from such tiny devices. It also gives them massive isolation -- blocking of external sound. In-ear 'phones can block noise better than much bigger, and more expensive, active noise reduction 'phones.

Etymotic Research (www.etymotic.com) is the big name in this area, but its cheapest model sells for around $250. Sennheiser, Sony, Shure and Koss have gotten in on the act with cheaper units.

In-ear phones become uncomfortable after extended use, they have problems with sound conducted through their cables if you bump them, and people who can't abide earplugs hate them from the get-go. But if you can stand them, they're great for mobile listening (especially on aeroplanes) and noisy workplaces.

Not everyone can be rescued from audio purgatory. Some people call tech support about 'reversed stereo' that's caused by speakers set up on the wrong sides of their monitor. Other people swear that $US700 is a fair price for a super-exotic power cable for their safe-sized amplifier - which raises some questions about how expensive a similar upgrade for the rest of the electrical grid would be.

But you don't have to be a golden-eared religious fanatic audiophile to hear the difference between a bog standard set of plastic multimedia speakers and a nice old stereo system, or between some bundled earbuds and some <i>good</i> headphones. The computer store's audio section is not the only place where slammin' sound can be found.