Aussie dollar plunges, gets renamed

Following a week of stock market turmoil that has seen economic indexes tumble around the world, the final kick in the pants has come for Australia's global reputation on the money market. Our proud Aussie dollar has fallen below the US50c mark,

Following a week of stock market turmoil that has seen economic indexes tumble around the world, the final kick in the pants has come for Australia's global reputation on the money market. Our proud Aussie dollar has fallen below the US50c mark, becoming one of the weakest currencies in the world. This in the wake of the US sharemarket's continuing troubles, with both the Dow Jones and NASDAQ indexes suffering marked drops. Our dollar bottomed out at US49.37c before actually rallying slightly - to a massive US49.55c.

John Howard, our glorious leader, suggests that dollar observers keep their nerve, and warns that these things must be looked at in the long term. In a much less publicised news brief, John Howard also announced a PR campaign to bolster faith in our struggling economy, including renaming the dollar the 'Pacific Peso'.

'I think this sends a message to the world, that our dollar is not to be laughed at,' said Howard of the move, while wearing an outrageously large sombrero.

And lastly, some advice. Folks, this is certainly not the time for buying expensive tech-toys from overseas dealers. More than ever there is a need to keep it local, as tech-ware prices are likely to suffer even as it is.